Big Money, Big Money!

Tried out for "Wheel of Fortune" on Saturday in Tunica, which is Las Vegas South for those who aren't edumacated in Southern geography. Maybe "tried out" isn't the most accurate phrasing. "Went to try out, filled out a form and sat in a huge room with about 1,500 other hopefuls for an hour and half" is more accurate. Dressed up a little. Drove the hour to Tunica from downtown Memphis (where I stopped off to hit the last Farmer's Market of the season), waited in line for about 20-30 minutes (fastest-moving line I've EVER been in!!), filled out a form with my pertinent info and interesting things about me, dropped said form in a box, took my seat, and pretended to be OVER THE TOP excited about being there.
I would have been excited, had I gotten on stage; I would have danced, sang, done yoga, yodeled, recited Chaucer, or whatever that obnoxious travelling host and "Vanna" asked me to do, for a chance to be on the "real" show and win the Big Money. But alas, Lady Luck was not smiling down on me on Saturday, because my name was not drawn at random to appear on stage for a chance to be called back for a second round of auditions, which would move me ever closer to Pat and Vanna.
All is not lost, or so I'm told, but I wouldn't hold my breath if I were you. The Big Money probably isn't coming anytime soon for me.

The Many Faces of Love

I'm always thinking about possible lessons I can use in the classroom these days, and today, for some reason, I was mulling over the idea of love songs and love poetry. After Sukkot, my juniors and seniors will be entering the Middle Ages, and we're going to spend a goodly amount of time on the Romantic ideal in relation to knights, their ladies, and the chivalric code.

I tend to blare my radio, windows down, singing off-key, on my way to pick Madeline up after school. I have a good 20 minutes in the car these days, so I get to listen to several songs. Today, one of the first songs I heard was "Promiscuous" by Nelly Furtado. Immediately after that, "You and Me," by Lifehouse, came on. I was struck by the irony of how similar and different these songs are at a glance. The former has a great beat and is perfect for dancing, working out, or making out; the latter, great for making out, but is closer to a ballad than Ms. Furtado's song. However, the underlying message is shocking similar: I like you, I am attracted to you and want to be with you. Each is effective in its own way, and each is useful, depending on how one is trying to woo a potential mate.

I KNOW I can use this in the classroom, though bringing in Furtado's version to play for the students *might* not be the best idea. I am, still, in search of the perfect love songs.

Why I Couldn't Put This Book Down

Recently, I was invited to become a part of a real book club. Ok, I invited myself, but that seems to be okay with these people. So anyway, I've always been a voracious reader but I've never belonged to a group who sits around and discusses books for fun. Books, wine, junk food. I am besotted.

This month, the book is "Twilight," by Stephenie Meyer. Not knowing much about the series but having a vague idea that it was written for teenaged girls, I turned my nose up slightly at the thought. I am, after all, in the middle of several other books, including Oliver Twist, a re-read of The Time Traveler's Wife, and whatever I happen to be reading in class with my students. Everything I've heard or read about this first book of the series has, heretofore, kept me at bay.

Well, the book club meets next Thursday night, and last night, I didn't have much school work to do, so I decided to go ahead and start reading. The book is 500 pages long, and I thought if I could just get a little bit into it, I'd be good. Whitney, a history teacher at MHAFYOS, warned me that I wouldn't be able to put the book down. Hmph. I sniffed as I began reading.

The first few chapters of this book are written exactly in the style of a teenaged girl. This, in my opinion, is NOT a compliment. There is a formula to the prose: noun, verb, adverb; noun, adjective, etc. I slogged through Bella's awkward reunion with her father, her first few days of school, her inane descriptions of each of her classes. Honey, I thought, I went to high school already. I don't need to relive it.

I already knew the premise of the story: girl meets boy, girl falls for boy, boy ends up being undead. Formulaic, boring. For an almost-thirty year old woman, I was really wondering how this novel ended up as a Book Club Pick.

Around page 100 or so of this tome, I began to notice the incredible tension that surrounds every exchange between Bella and Edward. Her other friends are not very well-developed (and alas, I have been told that they don't ever get more developed than that in the subsequent volumes); her relationship with her father seems to be on an even keel. The drama in each and every conversation: do they like each other? Does one hate the other? Why does Edward act the way he does upon Bella's arrival at the school? Why does he play with her mind? was getting tiring. But then, the explanations begin, and the conversations, though still fraught with high-school drama, are now rather intriguing.

I love, and I mean LOVE, the concept that seems to play out here: vampire with a conscience, a predator who hunts animals so he doesn't have to kill people. The reasons he gives Bella for needing and wanting to stay away from her, though they get repetitive and a bit tiresome, are also juxtaposed with the absolutely palpable tension and electricity in their exchanges, once they declare their feelings for one another.

And I think this is what is so completely disturbing and unnerving about this book for me: as an adult, reading the sexual and emotional tension between these two teenagers makes me itch. It physically makes me have to move around while reading the story, and because I am so visual, I have detailed scenes playing out in my head while I read.

The actual writing is terrible, but I love the concept. I began reading at around 9 and didn't stop reading until I'd finished the last page, at 2:30 in the morning. I NEVER, EVER do this. I don't know really how to put into words why I could not tear myself away from what I consider "junk food" in the literary world. This book should not win any awards. The author should be flogged for some of her prose. But her idea is just so alluring-- just like Edward Cullen's topaz eyes.

And for the record, I will NOT be seeing this movie. It makes me feel like a dirty old woman.

I Need You... to Help Me Feel Better

Ugh. Woke up this morning with the congested, achy head, sore throat, and stiffness in the neck that can only mean one thing: New School Year Funk. The ice-cold (blessedly) classroom, the new students with all their icky little germs, the fact that I can't work out as much as I'd like... these things all contribute to the generally crappy feeling that rolls around every fall semester when I'm exposed to a bunch of new people and germs.

I'm glad I've had my tonsils out (granted, that only happened summer '07), because otherwise I'd likely be out of school for a week with the funkiness. As it is, I'm hoping that I can keep it under control so I don't miss any school. We have several days off for Rosh Hashanah, Yom Kippur, and Sukkot (Jewish religious holidays, for the uninformed) and I need all the time with the kids I can get between now and then. Being sick would be BAD.

I'm appealing to my readers (all 2 of you) to bestow upon me your remedies for keeping the cooties at bay. I don't do flu shots but I'd be good for herbal, homeopathic or straight traditional medicine. Just help me. Quickly:)

Hmph. A Tofu Master, I am not.

Tried a recipe from veganyumyum.com, which looks absolutely gorgeous and not very difficult to make. Smoky miso tofu sandwiches-- I mean, how easy could this be, right?

Der.

I forgot the-- apparently-- most essential ingredient necessary to the success of the wonderful marinade for the tofu slices. Sugar. Add a bunch of salty Asian ingredients together and what do you have? Well, without the sweet contrast of the sugar, an MSG-fest.

So, I should read more carefully next time. Tomorrow: blueberry grunts, from the same website.

Wish me luck.

Iron Man with a Purpose

Coolest. Idea. Ever.
Exo Suit

What a fantastic use of intellect and ability, and what a horrible joke on the man who invented it not to be able to use this himself.

I hope people worldwide are able to use this suit, and that rehabilitation centers and medical insurance companies will cover the use of this.

Wow.

How the time flies

A brief apology: sorry I have not kept up like I wanted to with house renovations and the like; once we actually got moved in, the whirlwind did not-- and hasn't, yet-- slow itself. It seems rather to have gathered strength. I went to FL briefly to pick Maddie up from my parents' house, and came back to prepare for the new school year. This week, I'm in inservice all day without access to a computer or laptop, so there you go. Please forgive my sloppy contact. Soon, I will post some more pictures of the house, some of the Florida trip, and maybe even some of my new school and classrooms.

I have to go to the doctor tomorrow morning to have my left hand checked out; I have been having lots of pain and it's hard for me to grip anything tightly, to lift Madeline, and even to write (as I am left-handed). I'm thinking carpal-tunnel, but there's a slight chance of some sort of hairline fracture. Carpal-tunnel is more likely, and I will update all my readers (all five or so of you!) on that once I've heard from the doctor what the deal is.

Wishing you all well! Enjoy this un-summer-like weather for a few more days, as I'm sure the heat will return in full force very soon!

Renovations Day Two

So tired today, but we got a lot more done. My awesome friends Tiffany and Christine came to help, and that was really the thing that got us over the hump today. All the rooms are painted and the carpet is up in two rooms and the hallway. It's easy to get up, but the tack strips are a hooker to get out. Luckily, Patrick doesn't mind doing those!

Tomorrow's agenda includes: touching up paint in our room, pulling up the rest of the carpet, pulling up the tack strips, and sanding the kitchen cabinets. So we're still a little behind where I wanted to be, but perhaps I was a bit ambitious to begin with. Madeline was going to go to school this week one day, but perhaps we'll make it two so I can get a few more things done-- and besides, she misses her friends and wants to play outside all day anyway!

No pictures tonight but I'll have some, if not here, on my other pages, by Monday or Tuesday.

I am so sore but feel so great about what we've done without having to hire anyone to do it. That doesn't mean that I wont get someone to come in at a later date and finish the job--- but I think what we've done so far is something to really be proud of.

New Home Renovations Day One, or Why I Will Hire Someone to Do This Next Time

Oh, my back. Oh, my neck. My neck and my back. A day (plus a few hours) into the cosmetic surgery on our new house and I find I have seriously misjudged the amount of time needed to do the painting and carpet pulling. For starters, I hate pulling down wallpaper. Scratch that. The actual paper came off the walls like buttah. It was the backing, which did NOT come down like buttah, that I hate. We spent most of today taking turns scraping the walls, getting wallpaper glue all over our hands and piling up what looks like wet toilet paper on the floor in what is going to be Madeline's room. Ugh. Ugh. Ugh.

We did get two other rooms painted, and the colors, as you can tell from the photos, are really, um, brighter than we thought. We're hoping that they will dry darker, and of course, once furniture gets set up in the rooms, that will make a difference. Tomorrow's work includes cleaning the gross walls, pulling down a wallpaper border that didn't want to come off today, and hopefully starting on the carpeting.

So if any of my friends here in Memphis want to come help, please call me! I could use some extra hands:)

Reflections on Faith

Been thinking a lot lately about faith vs. religion. I am not, for many pragmatic reasons, particularly religious, though I was raised Catholic. Ultimately, I married a Catholic man whose family happens to run in the same religious circles as mine, but we are not really regular attenders of any type of religious establishment, Catholic or otherwise. We get a lot of flak about it from his parents, my parents, and silent flak from others.

For awhile, I thought that my lack of attendance might be working against me. After all, I didn't get an assistantship for the 2nd year of my Master's, I didn't get into any of the schools to which I applied for doctoral work, and I didn't get the first (or 2nd, or 3rd) job for which I applied and interviewed. Could someone be telling me something? Could it be that I am not, in fact, a decent enough person, despite my religious shortcomings, to have good things happen for me?

When I really sat and thought about it, I realized something that has probably been lurking for years, and which, though I've voiced before, I'm not sure how much I really believed in. That realization was that you *can* be a good person, have good things happen to and for you, without going to church every week, kneeling, standing, praying, singing, kneeling again (remember I was raised Catholic), standing, taking Communion, and lighting many, many candles in the hopes that one saint or another will intervene on your behalf and answer your prayers (or as it seems to be in so many cases, grant wishes). I have long thought-- and usually have my suspicions confirmed-- that there are a shitload of hypocritical "Christians" out there. Front row on Sunday, scrubbed and smiling, but last out of the bar on Saturday, scowling and drunk.

I have never really made apologies for who I am and what I do: yes, I smoke on occasion. Hell yes, I drink. But I have never, ever, tried to hide that. I believe in doing the right thing because it's the right thing to do, not because I'm trying to save my sinner's soul from eternal damnnation and hellfire. I have given money to beggars, fed stray animals, volunteered. I do those things, again, not because I want brownie points, but because it feels good to do them. To make another person smile, to help someone not so fortunate in their lives as I am in mine, is just the right thing to do. For me, going to church when I don't get anything out of it, or praying to God/Jesus/various and sundry saints when I need something is hypocritical, and I just don't think it's right. I'd rather be a sinner than a hypocrite, because I've never felt wrong admitting my shortcomings. I know I'm impatient, anal-retentive, overly annoyed by small things and a drill sargeant. I KNOW. I love myself anyway.

So for me, believing that something good would happen after so much negativity was faith in the universe, faith that the good deeds I'd done would recycle themselves back to me (the word is karma, folks. Learn it. Use it.) Faith in karma, in the cycles of good and bad, eventually brought those good things to us.

I'm going to keep on believing. But you aren't going to see me in church anytime soon, so don't ask.

Playing Catch-up

So much can happen in a week! We made the offer on the house, it was countered, we accepted the counter, had the inspection, and things are on track for us to close on July 17th!!! So now I'm packing, cleaning out, reminiscing while I clean (which considerably slows down the process!!), and then coming back to the den to work on lesson plans for one or more of the 4 different courses I'll be teaching this fall. I have a better idea now of the strengths and weaknesses of the students I will be teaching, so I'm making adjustments to my syllabi (I love that word!) and am doing a LOT of reading of new things for my classes, which means, of course, the end of "reading for fun" for a good while.

I'm also in organizational mode, and have at least three to do lists at any given time. Madeline will not be in school during July so I'll have to utilize my time at home with her to pack and sort without neglecting the longings of a 3 1/2 year old. I have BIG plans for her: the zoo, the Children's Museum, the park... and then of course, she will get to help me go through her old clothes and toys and decide what to donate to Goodwill. If I have to get rid of stuff, so does she. Granted, she doesn't have as many pairs of shoes as I do, but she beats me hands-down in the stuffed animal/doll department. And she's quickly developing her own library of children's books to rival mine.

Finally, I'm going to be shifting to Handy Jane mode in about 3 weeks. We are going to paint 3 bedrooms and a den and living room before moving in, as well as rip up the carpeting throughout the entire house. I've painted and ripped up carpet before, but not really on this scale. I just hope Patrick and I can handle it on our own in a 3 day weekend. There's also the removal of wallpaper to consider, and Patrick recently got me on camera promising to pull down all the wallpaper in the house (both bathrooms, the kitchen, one bedroom, the dining area, and a border in our room) but he'll have to do all the painting in those rooms. I've heard it can be a pain in the tukkus (which, one of the teachers at my new school tells me, is "Butt" in Yiddish!!), but am confident in my ability to channel all my aggressions into pulling that paper off the walls:) However, anyone with expertise in this area is welcome to give me advice or come help me out. I will not be renting a steamer-- the walls are drywall, and I don't want to damage them.

So I'm going from sitting around all summer to overdrive, but I'm not complaining. I can't wait to post pictures of the finished house!

A rambling missive

I went in to discuss my new job requirements today, and I have to say, I am so genuinely happy to be working at this place. First of all, I will have 4 different courses to teach, but each section will have maybe 8-10 students in it. This will give me much more time to work with each student individually, to really understand them and nurture them on their way to becoming lovers of literature. I brought home a pile of books about 2 feet high to go through and choose the works I want to include in my syllabi for each course, and I am so excited about getting to do that! I'm not stuck in one type of literature or stuck teaching only grammar, and I will get a chance to watch these young people grow and learn. I guess I'm meant to be a teacher after all!

Tomorrow morning, we are making an offer on a home. I really, really hope we get our first choice, and I really, really hope the woman who owns the home will agree to the things we ask for. Because I really like her house and want to make it ours, but there are some things we're not so handy with so we need her to fix them before we can agree to buy the home. I look forward to painting, pulling up carpet, clipping back shrubs, enclosing the yard, and all the things people do to make a house their own. I watch HGTV religiously to get ideas, and have lots for this new place. (I also will need lots of help and will be soliciting for supplies and labor in a couple of weeks!!!) I've chosen paint colors and found several kitchen sets that I like, flooring, appliances.... I should probably stay out of Home Depot:)

Mainly, I am thankful for the way things are going lately. I've had such a tough year so far and am really glad that things seem to be going in a positive direction now. My mom is going to come to town in July for a few days, then take Madeline back to Florida with her while we move. I'll go down to Florida shortly before I start work to get Maddie and bring her to her new home, and we will start a new chapter of our lives. Thanks to everyone who's been thinking of us and keeping us in their prayers as far as my job goes.

Now, who wants to help us paint? Remember, free beer!!!

NOW I can sleep well again!!!

Finally got a job and am going Friday morning to hammer out the details in my contract, get my textbooks, and set my schedule for the fall. I will be teaching at Margolin Hebrew Academy in East Memphis, and despite the fact that I'm not particularly religious myself, I'm really excited about the job-- small classes, essentially two sections of each course, with what seem to be some really great kids!

I am very excited about this job, not solely because I was at the end of the proverbial rope but because I really felt comfortable from the moment that I walked in for my interview. The atmosphere of community was heavy in the air and everyone I met was polite and welcoming. The Headmaster Rabbi is young, enthusiastic and friendly and I felt an immediate repoire with him as well as with the principal who interviewed me. Madeline goes to a Montessori school where community is vital and central to the philosophy and the experiences we've had there are almost all positive; for me to work in a place so much like that can only be nurturing to me.

So now, as you saw in my previous post, we get to move forward on the house front. Once the ink is dry on my job contract, we're going to try to move forward with the new house. Wish me luck!!!

An Appeal to All You Home Fixer-Uppers Out There!!!

Although I still need to get a job, once that time comes we plan to buy. We have narrowed our home choices down to two, and we want to make some decisions before we commit to one home or the other. One house is really pretty much updated-- I'm not a fan of the kitchen, so I'm going to paint the walls and cabinets when we move in and then eventually replace the countertops. Not too expensive. See this house at this site.

The other house, for some reason, I just have a soft spot for. It's very "vanilla" and there are mostly cosmetic changes that need to be made: painting every room, tearing down some wallpaper and pulling up the carpet throughout the house. We would paint, pull down paper/up carpet on our own and don't really need (professional, but friendly will be welcome and appreciated!) help with that, but there are some other considerations to be made. So, I'm asking y'all if you know of approximate costs for the following work, things you might recommend, or handypeople you might know that could help a sistah out (I don't know any contractors and don't want to call one just yet):

**outlets need to be grounded, approx. 6-8 outlets. The house was built in '59 so the capability should be there.

**curb appeal: we'd like to add some sort of front porch or overhang, as the house really needs it. Nothing fancy. Just go visit here. The whole front doesn't need "porching," just the half from driveway to front door.

**a teeny bit of fencing. Most of the property is fenced but we need to have the ability to put the dog out w/o worrying that he'll run off. So maybe 20 linear feet of fencing, at least some wooden. I'd be open to a cute iron fence on the sides, but no chain-link.

**ideas for a kitchen re-do that doesn't cost a billion bucks. Eventually I want to re-do the whole thing, floor to ceiling, including appliances, but does anyone have an idea how much just a good Mexican tile costs right now?

Also, if you have friends that aren't on Facebook that might be helpful or could point us in a good direction, please please pass this along. The first house I mentioned, the non-fix up, is $10K more than the 2nd, so I'm obviously wanting to keep the budget down to make it worth buying a house that needs work. Also, do I need an electrician to do the outlets? If so, I thought of asking the owners to do it since it's ultimately a safety issue in the home.

Thanks again, and please everyone keep your fingers crossed that I will get a job soon so we can move forward. Anyone who helps us move or paint when the time comes also gets free food and beer:)

Harry Potter and P*rn: A "Supernatural Enemy"

According to the Shreveport (La.) Unity of Faith community, Harry Potter books and pornography are at the heart of a declining culture and are considered a "supernatural enemy." In order to combat this spooky bad guy, they burned the Harry Potter books, tearing pages out and throwing them, along with pages from pornographic magazines (not, mind you, the *entire* magazine) into a fire pit at a three-day revival aimed at healing and strengthening against such horrors.

By the way, one of the pastors, James Crawford, represents IHOP-- the International House of Prayer. "Come to IHOP, kids!"-- now that's a good way to get 'em in the door.

Read the shortish article here, but scroll down for the real debate.

Cartoons for women

Because I dig it. Here's the link to a fun little set of cartoons that my friend Jeannie just turned me on to.

Dude. . .Wait, what was I saying?

Duh.

Sixty percent of the time it works, every time.

Today, as you know, was the Puerto Rico primary. And I don't know about you, but I could not watch 10 seconds of coverage without being more confused than ever before about our democratic process.

For starters, the numbers, percentages, and statistics alone are enough to drive anyone to drink. Looking at the coverage on television, with all the numbers and charts was like watching a sever weather alert with all it's little maps and coverage areas. I just can't keep up. Maybe that makes me a little stupid-- and I'll be the first to admit I'm not really "up" on politics, though I have been trying to keep up more lately. (I won't even go in to our local elections!!) Yet it seems that every day, we are bombarded with more numbers that truly don't mean a thing in the long run. Here's an example:

"Obama and his aides projected confidence, and even in defeat, he gained 17 delegates in Puerto Rico, leaving him 47 short of the 2,118 needed to clinch the nomination."

Okay, well....

"With all precincts reporting, the Puerto Rico vote count showed Clinton with 263,120 votes, or 68 percent, to Obama's 121,458, or 32 percent.

"A telephone poll of likely Puerto Rican voters taken in the days leading up to the primary showed an electorate sympathetic to Clinton — heavily Hispanic, as well as lower income and more than 50 percent female. About one-half also described themselves as conservative.

"Nearly three-quarters of all those interviewed said they had a favorable view of Clinton, compared to 53 percent for Obama. One-third said they didn't know enough about Obama to form an impression.

"The survey was conducted Tuesday through Saturday for The Associated Press and the television networks by Princeton Survey Research Associates International. It included 1,587 likely voters with a candidate preference; sampling error was plus or minus 3.1 percentage points.

"Obama had a total of 2,071 delegates in The Associated Press count, including 17 from Puerto Rico. He also gained the support of two superdelegates during the day.

"Clinton has 1915.5, including 38 from Puerto Rico.

"There are 31 delegates combined at stake in Montana and South Dakota on Tuesday, and Obama's high command sounded confident that enough superdelegates were poised to quickly climb on and deliver him the nomination."

Regardless of who you're pulling for, one thing is clear (as mud): these numbers, while seemingly impressive on the surface, don't do much but confuse the general populace. Personally, I'm trying not to get on any bandwagon, and plan on voting for the person whose character and record speaks to me in the best way. Now, if they offer cake and coffee at the voting polls, that would be even better.

here's the link to the article:
http://www.comcast.net/articles/news-politics/20080601/Primary.Rdp/

MRD calendars, as promised

Come out and play, Memphis! Good times are promised, AND you'll get to see me. Not on skates, of course. But there.

When I skate, my brains shake loose a little

Concussions are so not fun. Even "slight concussions," basically a term for the non-unconscious brain injury, suck major butt. First, there's a headache. Then, dizziness similar to that gained from drinking mojitos all night and not eating (a.k.a., the "spins"); after that, a tightness and dull pain in the head that can cause auras, which migraine sufferers are familiar with. Headaches that don't go away with OTC or prescription meds, are not allergy-related or sinus-pressure variety, and which creep back down the spine (if you land hard enough on your tailbone, it shakes ya right up to your brain-- you don't necessarily have to land on your head to get a concussion).
This is how mine came about. Skating around at practice last week, we were doing weaving drills. One of the other newbies, a really sweet girl and a pretty good skater, lost her balance when it came to me, and fell, pulling me down. Since she was behind me and I wasn't expecting her to grab me, I went down directly on the ole ass, which is not as padded as it used to be, and a little shock went straight back up. Good times. I shook it off, but came home and went straight to bed, as I was unusually tired (I am usually up for an hour, hour and a half after practices with adrenaline still surging through); I woke up in the middle of the night with the aforementioned spins so bad I could not walk to the bathroom without grabbing everything in arm's reach to hold me up. When I got up the next morning, the pain in my head had radiated back down into my neck and shoulders.
I probably should have gone to the doctor, and usually don't have a problem doing so. This just didn't seem like the kind of problem to take to my regular doctor, and getting a CAT scan or MRI just isn't my idea of a good time. Besides, I didn't want to be told that I couldn't practice anymore. But getting warmed up for practice tonight, I just could not get into it. I decided that, for the next few weeks, I'm going to take a break from being Smashly the Hood, and work out on my own. Then, hopefully, when I return to practicing, I will be more comfortable on my skates and won't go down so easily. Smashed the Hood doesn't sound very threatening out there on the track!

Fear and loathing in Memphrica.

Not even the end of May, technically, and already the weather has begun to heat up. I should, like, totally be prepared and used to the heat by now, but I'm like, totally, NOT. I HATE it with a passion normally ascribed to certain members of the government and various administrations; I loathe this sticky, lung-filling, oppressive heat the way I loathe the smell of garbage, asparagus, and rancid meat. Come June, most years, I turn the air down as much as I can without freezing out other members of the household and begin to walk around in as few clothes as I feel comfortable answering the door in, should anyone come calling. I take cooler showers and am generally in a foul humor until about October, when the leaves turn and the air smells of fires and football. Fall, I love. Winter, I glory in. Summer, I want to stab with a knife and deflate.
This year will be no different, aside from what seems to be an extra two or three weeks of heat. Weather.com says our forecast for the next 10 days includes heat, oppressive heat, very little rain, and more sticky humidity-laden heat.
I grew up in Florida, another reason I should be prepared and acclimated to the climate. I always joke that Florida only has two seasons-- hot and hot-as-hell-- and to that end, I suppose I could be grateful for the modicum of cooler weather we tend to experience between November and early March here in the mid-South. But because I'm me, I'm only grateful for that for a few hours a year, because the rest of the time, I'm too busy bemoaning the humidity and pollenated air to remember that, at some point, however brief, I will be able to pull out the sweaters and jeans without suffocating. I'm not much of a shorts kinda gal anyway, so summer weather for me still means capris or jeans, an occasional dress, and tank tops of the white-trash variety. I just can't dress for the season, so I try not to go out into it any more than I absolutely have to (ase in point: we've been in hibernation most of this weekend, because in opening the door to step out we choke on the thickness of the air. Then, tonight, it blessedly rained it's proverbial ass off!!!)
If you need to find me, for any reason, I will be on the couch with a Mojito, a good book, and in my undies. And don't be offended if I'm not exactly happy to see you. It isn't you, I promise.

Girls can be hardcore, too.

I have recently signed on to be a Memphis Roller Derby (www.memphisrollerderby.com) girl. The league has been around for about two years now, and up until quite recently, was based in Collierville-- kinda far to go to skate three nights a week. When I discovered they had moved to the Memphis Fairgrounds for practices and bouts, I was super-excited. There are a few moms at Maddie's school who are derby girls, and one has been encouraging me to come out and play for awhile.
So I bit the bullet and went out to watch one night, and now I'm super-pumped to go out and, as most of my friends and family say, "work out some of my aggression." (This is not in the least bit ironic, since I tend to scream at people on the road, on the phone, on the TV, and in the grocery stores when they move too slowly.) I loved watching and went the next day to get pads and skates. We do this on four-wheeled, old-fashioned skates, kids. No 'blades allowed.
The four teams in our league are Angels of Death (undefeated this season, go Angels!), the Women of Mass Destruction, The PrissKilla Prezleys, and the Legion of Zoom, or Z-Girls. They are all fantastic people. I expected, honestly, to be greeted by a bunch of meanies upon arrival, but so far, everyone has been freaking AWESOME, both on and off the track. I haven't been on skates in YEARS, so my first night out, I was ridiculous, and thought, "maybe this isn't for me." But every week I get better, get more bruises (apparently a sign of improvement!), and make more friends, and soon, I'll be eligible for a draft to get onto a team.
The travel team, composed of girls from all four teams, has lots of bouts in the summer, and I will soon post a schedule for their home bouts. The formal season will begin in the fall, and I encourage all of you to come out to the Fairgrounds and support our league-- and of course, me. I already have a "Derby name": Smashly the Hood. Look for me on a rolelr rink near you. I'll be the one falling on my ass.

Whose fault is it, really?

The latest news in the entertainment world that is causing an (unnecessary) uproar concerns someone I, admittedly, do not know too much about. Hannah Montana, aka Miley Cyrus, has taken some pictures that have thrown normally rather serious newscasters, along with mothers across the country, into a tizzy that shows me how conservative this country really is, underneath the liberal wolf's clothing.
As the mother of a daughter who is not quite old enough to really watch Hannah Montana, and as a parent who has, in the past, been upset by little girls dressed up to look waaaaaay older than they really are, my primary question about the whole Miley situation is, "what's the damn problem?"
YES, I know she's fifteen. I understand that the pictures were a bit, well, revealing. Um, has anyone seen the photo shoot of Lindsey Lohan? I don't care if she's older, those pictures are revealing and a bit, well, trashy. The photos of Miley are just NOT.
And let's get to the real meat here. Would so many people be so upset if every media outlet in the universe hadn't jumped all over this, splashing the pictures on the 5 o'clock, 6 o'clock, and 10 o'clock news, not to mention all over the Internet and TMZ, the bane of many celeb's existence? The pictures are in VANITY FAIR, people. This is NOT a teen magazine. Hell, it's a niche market, to be honest. I don't even read Vanity Fair.
If people are concerned about these photos, do the responsible thing and TALK TO YOUR KIDS ABOUT THEM. Obviously, overexposure by the media has turned this into a three-ring circus disaster and children who probably would have not come across these on their own are now having their parents wonder if Miss Cyrus is really such a good role model for their children. But being responsible and talking to your kids about this sort of thing, explaining that this was maybe not the wisest decision for her at this age but that she isn't showing her crotch, doing drugs, or having babies at her age. Personally, I don't see the problem with the pictures. She's a teenager, and the teens I know do a lot worse than this, some even younger than she is!
I think it's also crucial to remember that she is human, and she will make mistakes. If she doesn't turn out like Britney, or other young starlets and singers who have gone the way of the hoochie mama, can we consider her a saint, lucky, or someone to "really" be looked up to? Additionally, for her to come out and apologize, taking issue with the fact that the shoot didn't go how she envisioned it, is a very grown-up and responsible thing to do as well. Rather than villify her, her parents, the photographer or magazine, we should simply let it go and move on to something more important.
http://www.seenon.com/image/external/SeenonSlideshow/albums/album-40/lg/MileyCyru_Gregg_14433148_600.jpg/fetch/MileyCyru_Gregg_14433148_600.jpg

Some of my friends know I've been struggling with a bit of an existential crisis the last few months. After not being accepted to any of the schools to which I applied for doctoral work, I resigned myself to going back to work-- and soon. Not that I don't want to work, but I have been in preparation for two years to move on to heavier, more involved work at the doctoral level, and to bust my ass for so long only to be turned down, four times, is a bit deflating.
At any rate, it's been about a month and a half since I got my last "no" letter for school, and since then, I've been working hard at several things: finishing my thesis and defending, getting the rest of my school work done, and applying for jobs. Any job, really, though I'm rather picky. See, now I have an extra $30K in student loans to pay off, in addition to I don't even know how much from before. But being as how I now have 2 master's degrees and almost 3 years teaching experience, I didn't count on much trouble finding another teaching position. I applied to two different school districts as well as a bevy of non-teaching positions. I interviewed with (assistant) superintendents, and a couple of principals.
Yet here we are, and still no job. I cannot understand how in the world it could take this long to call potential teaching candidates about interviewing for positions that are already open. Nor can I understand how, after a particular interview goes very well, I would get no follow-up phone call, email or letter in the mail regarding the position. The lack of professionalism, coupled with the agony of waiting around with my thumb up my ass for a phone call, is almost too much to bear at this point.
See, our lease is up soon, and I really would rather not stay in this house for another year. The kitchen is too small to turn around in, the ceiling fan in our room is broken, and there's a hole in the ceiling above Madeline's bed that hasn't been repaired yet. Our landlord won't let us make any changes to the property, nor will she pay for any improvements like, oh, I don't know, SOD in the front yard. We are also responsible for maintenance of the yard, which is covered in leaves and those nasty little worm-looking things right now, making it tough to enjoy these early spring days.
All that to say, we want to buy, but can't do so until I get a job. We also have to give said landlord 30 days' notice, so if I get a call in late June, we're effed for getting out of here before the school year starts, and as those of you with family and job obligations are aware, trying to move during the school year is just not pleasant. So sure, there are self-imposed deadlines and complications, but can I really be blamed for wanting to (finally) own a home and live like responsible adults?

I feel really lost and frustrated about the entire situation. I'm not really the praying type, and therefore it seems rather hypocritical to pray that I get a job. I leave that to the church ladies in the family; so far, though, it isn't working. I've had a couple of really good interviews, and nothing has come of them. I can't understand why, if someone knows they have open positions, they would choose to wait until the end of the summer to hire people. Are they waiting for the freaking Golden Child or something? Truth be told, I'd rather not teach high school again, but if I'm not going to be a student anymore, I should do something more than answering phones and opening mail for someone else. I have too much education to waste on a job like that, and I have too many financial obligations to take a job that can't pay them.

I've just been really sad about it all today, and it seems like every time I get my hopes up about something, even just the slightest bit, I get a huge jolt of-- I don't even know what. I've spent the last 6 months preparing, stressing, waiting, and I just want some good news. Soon. Before I go absolutely insane.

An inaugural post

Always inspired by someone else, so I'll have to give Ciara her due here. (Visit her at nalezing.blogspot.com) She always makes me laugh and think, and lately I've been thinking a lot about the state of things here in Memphis. Well... not even just Memphis, at all, but the whole US, the world.
I'm not a dem, not a repub, and some people might say I actually have no opinions. Those people really don't know me, but their reasons for saying so would come from a little online test called a "political compass" test, which I took over a year ago and which placed me, interestingly enough, slightly off the exact center of the "compass" itself. I'd like to think (and those of you who really DO know me would likely agree) that I have rather strong opinions about lots of things, and that those opinions are pretty much what keep me tottering right there in the middle. Some things I'm way left of center on, some way right. Regardless, I think this is the place I'll come to work them out for awhile. Feel free to join me if you like, or send "a friend" to come argue with me about it. Whatever, man. No worries.

Maybe tomorrow I'll have a good opinion to share.